Returning from the O'Reilly ETech Conference, I was made painfully aware what an incredibly lack of innovation or change has occured in air travel in the past few decades – if anything I would say it has regressed.
Please excuse the ranting tone, but its some thoughts I have to put out there in hopes future generations will read it and realize how crazy we are.
When I say painfully I mean it. Flying a redeye
I just want to relax and sleep a bit. For a short while I did, but then the cold aching from a lack circulation started pulsing through my legs and back. With little room I had to keep shifting in my seat into akward positions which have left my back spasming for two days now. To think I used to do this 2-3 weeks a month for a few years. It took months of chiropractic work to get be back to tolerable levels. My only saving grace then was that I got bumed up to first class often because I had amassed so many miles.
So it isn't the added security that bothers me. It may be the one of the only places where any real progress has occured in the past couple of decades. As long as you get there a bit earlier and have down a system for emptying your pockets, its really not that bad.
I'm referring to the deplorable cattle-like conditions one is subjected to endure from the boarding till deplaning. What makes matters worse is that I'm 6'5" – a height that is clearlly outside the bounds of their cabin design. Unless its a short shuttle flight, each time I board a plane I know Its probably going to be a painful and frustrating experience. I still do it because I like to see other places and meet people. It is necessary in the space in which I work – traveling to see clients and traveling to attend conferences like ETech. Being completely uncomfortable and annoyed with these conditions, I sit in my humna pretzel position astounded that there isn't a better way to do this.
- It starts with boarding. Calling passengers 10-15 isle at a time breeds chaos and not enforcing that rule makes it worse. I once (sadly only once) saw a gate agent chastize a passenger and send him to the back of the line because he was attempting to board before his isle was called. I almost hugged her. I always thought lining people up like an amusement parks lines up a roller coaster would get us on the plane faster. Its already a zoo as passenger coming charging from all directions to the ticket collection agent to scrap for the overhead luggage space once in the main cabin.
- Overhead luggage loading. Once upon a time you could carry almost anything on the plane to try and stuff inthe overhead compartment. The new air security measures has seemingly force the hand of airlines to better enforce that. Still its a mess – loading it in wrong, loading it in so the compartment can't close, smashing other passengfers luggage, dropping it on other passengers heads (like me), smacking another in the head because they have no regard or patience for fellow passengers (like me) or simply not being tall enough/strong enough to get it up there. Wouldn't it be so much better if there was a carry-on luggage loading procedure? Airline personnel who know what they are doing take your bags on ahead of you and load it perhaps leaving a ticket with your bags location (which should be right by you anyway) on it.
- Exit rows – the holy grail of the cattle-class seats. Its like a reality TV show come to life. People will do anything for the handful of exit row seats with tolerable leg space. Friday evening as I was waiting for my redeye flight to board I overheard a man arguing that he lost his exit row seat.
Sir you are traveling with children who are not permitted to sit in an exit row,
she explained. (He wasn't missing much though because most exit seats on a 737 and some around them do not recline.) I wish they where more strict about who they sit in that row. Perhaps precertify passengers based on some basic criteria or training to handle an emergency exit door. I'd do it. I would trust me more then some of these clowns (and clownettes) I see in those seats. There are times I take a look at those seats and say if we have an emergency we're just dead. Like when I see a 5'3" woman older then my mother sitting in that seat. Call me bias, but I don't have a lot of confidence that in an emergency someone like that will be able to handle removing an escape hatch that weighs half their own weight.
- Using smaller planes and selling out flights. Maybe its because I fly Continental a lot leaving close to Newark airport (LaGuardia is tough to reach and JFK is worse), but I remember when a cross country trip drew one of larger aircraft where passengers had some room to move about. In recent years I've noticed soldout, overstuffed flights with wait lists have become the norm even in these tough economic times. I'm sure there are some airline bean counters out there that could show me a chart that smaller airplanes is more cost effective and efficent. Well I'm glad for them because I now loath flying and airlines. I'd rather have less choices and more space any day. I've never found the flight options very convienent anyway. I was quoted $1200 for my flight over a month before ETech. Is $1200 not enough? Thankfully I still had some frequent flyer miles left.
- As if using more smaller planes wasn't bad enough, it seems to me that the airlines have (generally speaking) moved the seats a few inches closer to fit a couple of extra rows for the same reasons. (
Than you sir. May I have another?
) I don't have hard numbers, but I can feel it. Those inches make a big difference for me.
- Isle or Window? This goes to the previous two points. I often contemplate which is really better for someone like me. I always opt for the isle so I have a little bit of room to work with to restore circulation to me legs with. Getting smacked a few times by other passengers luggage and the beverage cart each flight makes me wonder if I'm making the right choice. The middle is just inhuman if you are over 6'2" or 240 pounds. Sitting next to one of these poor souls is worse. First you feel bad for them then you just get plain annoyed because they're annoyed and take it out on you for having an isle seat.
- You don't need to eat. As if we have plenty of personal space, more and more flights do not serve meals or only a
snack
even if its a 5 or 6 hour flight. Now you have to buy overpriced airport food and bring it on board. Hurrah for service!
- As for checked luggage airlines should adopt a system like FedEx's shipping bins so luggage could get unloaded faster and could theoretically be picked up right at the gate.
I just find it astounding that so little technological change has been introduced into the industry. We have online ticket purchases and eTicket. (Wow.) The airplanes are generally the same except for the new security measure. Despite all of the business travel in this country most do not have power outlets for passengers with laptops – a significant number each flight even if their screen is pressed in their chest. Some planes have personal entertainment centers. I've always appreciated Virgin Atlantic for this. (I understand they've upgraded their system to include passenger trivia tournaments.) While I have not gotten a chance to fly them, I'm always cheering on JetBlue in hopes the other airlines get a clue. (Sadly JetBlue only leave from JFK currently and I've yet to have a chance to fly them.) Recently some airlines have started adding broadband to their flights. Long overdue, but based on some of the efforts I saw they are on track to screw this up.
Jon Udell once wrote about the Delta shuttle's passenger information system which is simple, effective, but smart. I've flown the shuttle numerous times and really apprecaite the system. Communicating what is going makes such a big difference it baffles me what is so hard.
Lastly I find it amazing that we are still using the same general airplane designs from decades ago. The Concorde was supposed to be the future of air travel yet soon they will all be retired soon and not be replaced because of their high costs. We can fly missiles fired hundreds of miles away into through a window, but we haven't been able to engineer a better commercial jetliner for decades?
Its moments like Friday evening's flight home that leaves me perplexed that no one is smart/courageous enough to figure out a better way and simply innovative. I don't think its any coincidence that airlines are doing so poorly. Maybe consumers are only willing to pay for cheap tickets because they feel they're getting a cheap service? If it made logistical sense I'd only Virgin Atlantic and JetBlue.
When will this absurdity end? What will it take for the airline industry to innovate? Does anyone else care?
